Little Happiness

»Recipe for “Little Happiness”

I am a left-brained introvert, a self-described realist, and a glass-half-empty type of gal. I’m also extremely happy. At least, I am right now. Ask me in a few hours and my answer might be different.

In all this talk of happiness, let us not forget that it is an emotion, which according to Wikipedia is a “complex evaluative (postive or negative) reaction of the nervous system in response to external or internal stimuli.” In addition to happiness, other emotions we feel include fear, sadness, anger, surprise, and ambivalence. Why is it that we seek balance in other areas of our lives, but when it comes to the way we feel, we only want to be happy, 100% of the time?

Not only is the notion of being in a constant state of happiness unrealistic, it’s also unhealthy. Fear can keep us safe; sadness lets us heal; anger can be a catalyst for change.

Having said all that, I do believe the pursuit of happiness is important. I use the word pursuit because one of the key points I’ve learned from reading scientific happiness research is that the majority of humans are not wired for it, it takes work. Blame it on the brain!

Here is my recipe for feeling happy more often:

Recognize what makes me feel good. I take the time to register my emotions so that I don’t pass by a moment of happiness unnoticed. This sounds absurd, but we’ve all ruined a perfectly good moment by worrying about future events. The classic example is the feeling of dread you may get on Sunday evenings as you start to think about work the next day. This practice also helps me identify what it is that actually makes me happy, which keeps me from repeatedly doing things only because I think they should make me happy.
Record what made me feel good. Because the human brain is really bad at remembering past events and feelings correctly, I like to make a record of happy times, either through writing or photographs.
Repeat. The entire premise of the book Stumbling on Happiness is that we are really bad at predicting what will make us happy. If we have a record of what has made us feel good in the past, we can more accurately predict what will make us happy in the future.
One of my favorite quotes on happiness comes from French psychiatrist Christophe Andre: “Striving toward absolute, huge, oceanic happiness, le bonheur fou, can be discouraging and distract you from little happiness.”

Little happiness. I can deal with that.

By Terell Meek